Love Drunk...

Video from a rehearsal with Ryan Alan...Song is called "Love Drunk" and we all can be intoxicated with love..Music is medicine and I need my dose. More to come. Enjoy.

Remember....

There are so many things I could say that I could think of to make the pain go away I feel it like a knot in my stomach I knew it would hurt but I have to face it, can't run from it The first time I saw you, I knew you were the one Who would make me smile, in the times I thought there was no one to be there, to smile, and let me know everything would be okay You truly did just that, in your own special way I can remember doing my school papers and you were right behind me in my chair I tried to kick you out several times, but you would scream with the loudest stare I knew you were gonna be there, no matter where I'd go Your love was unconditional and how I loved it so I wish that day never happened, that I found you laying in that space I just had to have the faith, you are in a much better place I remember how you'd make the room laugh, at the drop of a dime with your sassy class, and those puggy wuggy eyes I remember how you were there at the transition in my life You still kept loving me, and let me know things would be alright I'm gonna miss you and I'm going to take it day by day I know you're in Heaven, chillin, doing things your way I said my prayers and I'm thankful for the time you were here But somehow, you will never be gone, because your spirit will always be near When i feel love, when i see love, when i know it in an unconditional way I'll think of you, because you were love, nothing else to say.... Missin You My Lil Baby...

Fear can look like anything.....

My air conditioning was not working in my house, and for the past couple of days it has been humid and in the 90's. I couldn't stay at my place one more minute, so I decided to go down to my parents house and get some rest. I knew it would be nice and cool at their house so I was ready to go. As I made my way through the door, I could feel the coolness hit my body and I was super excited to hit a cool bed. I had lived with my parents through childhood and high school, so I knew exactly where I was going. Make no mistake, even though I've been out of my parent's house for years, I still made claim to "My Room". I was ready to go. My feet could not move fast enough. I was so anxious to get to "My Room" and flop down on my cool bed. It was going down! As I entered the room, I was ready to take a plunge onto my bed. I was ready to enter into the world of dreams. I raised my hands and turned my body to lay down. As I laid down, I hit something and it made a laughing noise. My heart started racing, wondering what could this be? Oooo no, I thought that Chuckie is here. As some may know, I do have some things that make me a little not like the so called "normal" person. As a child, at night, I use to think Dark Vader was in my closet to get me. I got scared and started crying when I saw the video, "Thriller" because I knew those characters in the video were real and out to get me. And yes, I am claustrophobic. Soooo, as I laid down, there was this laughing chuckle that went straight into my back. I felt the funny thing go into my back and I then shouted a few words I may not need to repeat at the moment. I was saying, what is this? Then my face turned. It was....a

Booga Bear! My heart was racing really fast! I didn't know what to do! So I turned around and before I knew it, I grabbed it by the neck. I looked it in the eyes. Yes, I faced my fear. That's when I realized, this is way too funny, but there is something that I can learn from this. Simply, turn around, and look fear in the eyes. Grab it, and hold it. There is nothing it can do to you. After a while, I started laughing to myself, and I ended up in the world of dreams. Moral of this story, face it, fear could be some old cotton filled booga bear standing between you, and your world of dreams. Until next time, peace. D.

Don't Give Up...Go For It....

Go for it...Don't hold back. These are three words that I've wrestled with all my life. I don't think I realize how much power is within me if I decided not to hold back. I've held back a lot in life on love, pursuits, and things that took that "all or nothing" approach. I am spontaneous at times, however I let what others think, or what I thought internally in terms of risk stop what I was feeling in my heart. I admit it, I held back. I realize though, there is something beautiful about letting go. You're not holding back, you get a chance to experience how powerful you are. Loving someone in spite of what happens, just trusting every inch of yourself. Feeling that no matter what, you experienced the passion of You. A lot of times, we think about how that other person or something might hurt us, when its not about them, never has been. It's all about you trusting yourself, knowing that no matter what happens, you will still be okay. No matter how busy or crazy life gets, love still finds us. Right where we are. Sometimes, totally unprepared, unrehearsed, it shows up. As I'm working on a new album, I'm "letting go" and it feels awesome! I use to listen to outside voices, but now I'm so tuned into mine. I will say, I'm not afraid of letting go, but I have no idea of the magnitude of power that's going to come out of me when I release. That's real. I think I'm afraid of how much power I never realized I had, bottled all up inside. If something or someone makes you feel alive, feel special, gives you a feeling that you've never experienced, go for it. You can then say at least, I gave my all, no matter what happens, I experienced, I did it, Go for it.:-)

Enjoy Your Peace and Live In It....Worry Is Just An Illusion...

Worry, is just an illusion, it serves no purpose, yet so many of us, including myself are guilty of it. This pic looks like my baby pug who is visiting for a few weeks, is chilling on a serious tip, but I realized looking at her, its absolutely great when you can be in such a state, that you look like you are in absolute Heaven. I haven't seen her in a few months, but I was just reminded of her "No worries" pose. She would do this periodically, and I didn't get it, until it clicked one day. I was worrying about something stupid, then I looked over at her and started laughing out loud. She just reminded me, to enjoy your present, the past is just a memory. I see more and more, animals just get it. They may fight, and do other things like make litters of babies, (freaking stray cats that like to screw all day) but they don't worry, as the pic indicates I think they think, "I Got This". The more I look at her I see just how much she's teaching me about life. She looks like she's just having fun and when she is in that state, nothing else matters. Even though the years are passing by, she's still doing her thing and still giving and receiving love. I know there are a lot of things going on around us and so many questions and things to think about. I have bills, how am I going to pay them? I have so many things to do but so little time, how can I make this happen? Is my marriage okay? Is this person cheating on me? Does he/she really like me, just for me? So many questions, and so many answers were trying to find, but at the end of the day, the one thing that matters most is to simply enjoy your peace and live in it.

Love and Chivalry......

Took a very long walk in the park today and its funny how nature makes you think. As I was walking through the park, me and a friend saw this policeman with a horse. I saw this and immediately thought about how high this policemen was on top of this horse as well as how much trust this policeman had to have in knowing that the horse would do exactly what it needed to do. Watching the horse and the policeman also made me feel a strong sense of protection and chivalry. As I was watching this, it made me think of the great amount of trust these officers had to have when riding. Then it came to me, the more trust this policeman put into this horse, the more the horse would naturally get into a flow of trusting as well. As I also looked at the policeman, I noticed how much respect and admiration was shown to him for riding through the park making sure the park goers were safe. I felt a sense of chivalry and bravery watching the two policemen and it made me feel so safe. This made me realize even more, all the things love can move you to do; be brave, move forward, and exhibit courage. Whatever symbol or experiences you have in your life, know that love is here to guide and protect, and when you put your trust in it, it will do exactly what it needs to do.

The Little things.....Random Randomness

I realize in this world there are so many things out there. Every day, businesses are selling something new. Something new in fashion, the latest technology, or the latest new model car. There are so many things that are constantly being presented to us, we get excited, and try to buy the hottest new item that we think will make us more attractive or feel better. We sometimes think the bigger the house, the fancier the car, the bigger the bank account, the happier we will be.

Whenever I need to see things a little more clearly, I simply look at nature. I see how grateful animals are for the little things. Birds singing in the morning lets me know they are here with no worries, singing their song of life. Cows mooing in the afternoon lets me know they are alive, no worries, grazing on the beautiful grass. These are the little things that say to me, wow they have the secret to happiness!

Things like a new car, new house, and new money are great, but only have a temporary time before the newness wears off. When buying a new car and smelling the newness of it, its great, but how long does the newness last? You might have an old beat up "hooptie", but just being grateful that you own it, and still have a means of transportation, makes you want to clean it, and maintain it as if it were a new Porsche or Lamborghini. By simply appreciating what you have, it only makes you one step closer to the richness for you that's simple and free, Inner peace.